The Blog Post That (Almost) Never Was

I had it all planned out.

A few months ago, before my sister, Allison (my TWENTY year old sister, Jesus Christ), got married, she called me. This in and of itself is significant because she only calls me when she wants to know how big my daughters are or if someone died.

I answered the phone, “Who died?”

I didn’t expect the tears and it only increased my suspicion that either my brother did something stupid (like that time he hiked the Appalachian Trail) or my mother had finally killed someone.

No one had died. Literally, anyway.

She said, “Now I know how you feel.”

My estranged father – asshole among assholes – informed her in his own passive-aggressive way (through HIS mother!) that he would not be attending his youngest daughter’s wedding because my step-father would be walking her down the aisle.

For those of you thinking he might be justified in being upset, my parents divorced when Allison was 5 or 6 (I was 12) and married my step-father shortly after. He’s the one who helped raise her. He’s the one she called “Dad.” And sometimes “Oatey,” which I’m still not sure as to the origin of. She’s weird.

Anyway, the blog post.

The wedding was on November 2nd of this year. Needless to say, my father didn’t show. A week later, I asked Allison if it would be okay if I wrote a blog post including her name, etc. about this shit in the form of an open letter, kind of like the one Sineade O’Conner wrote to Miley Cyrus. She gave her blessing and I started planning it.

Then I decided to work on my novel instead.

Then I planned some more.

Then I read a book instead.

Then I planned some more.

Then I did anything else instead.

See a trend? I wasn’t avoiding it. FAR from it. I just found better things to do.

And that’s when it sort of clicked in my head. This wasn’t the first time he’d done this to me or one of my siblings, but somewhere along the way, I found better things to do than seek revenge on a person who doesn’t deserve that much brain power.** This post you’re reading now I wrote in ten minutes while my daughters watched Mulan.

The lesson is this (and this goes for you too, Allison): don’t waste time worrying about people who don’t worry about you. It’s okay to be angry. In fact, it’s healthy. But you’d be surprised how quickly it goes away when you don’t encourage it.

I hardly noticed.

**this rule does not apply to people on THE LIST. Those people are SO doomed. *cackles*

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